He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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