How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize