an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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