WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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