white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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