sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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