weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Randomize