My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
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