You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
