Betty ford says i'm here all night
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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