You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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