She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I think people are normalizing furries
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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