Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
