we're making bets on your personal life
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
