i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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