worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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