All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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