Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize