That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You're a waste of cheezeits
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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