Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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