Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
