Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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