Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
