He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
