My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
