with your own penis?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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