You can't motorboat a personality
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
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