This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize
