I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Randomize
