Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
