woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
