Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
