Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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