haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Is it because I queefed?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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