Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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