I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
