I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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