So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
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