I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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