So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
