question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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