Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
