don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
