we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
