Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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