I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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