Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Shame - the story of my life.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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