Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
