Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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