He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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