took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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